Bring 200 grams of water to a boil. Weigh out 15–18 grams of coffee (depending on how strong you like it).
Grind size for Aeropress can range from fine to medium grind. For this recipe we are going to grind fine, we are looking for something around medium consistency.
Insert a paper filter into the AeroPress's detachable plastic cap, the round black thing in the photo. Try not to hurt yourself.
Use some of your hot-as-fuck water to wet your filter and cap.
INSIDER HOT TIP
You won't find this information in any other Aeropress brew guide on the web, we checked. TIP: Don't put your dick in it.
Assemble your AeroPress. Make sure it is dry, any residual moisture can compromise the device’s seal. And nobody likes taking hot shots of liquid to the face.
Place it on your scale with the flared end up, then tare the weight. The numbers should appear arse-end up. It is possible to attach the black filter cap first and place it right side-up, but this tends to cause leakage and make brewing a minor fucking calamity.
Add your ground coffee. DO NOT spill any grounds into the ring-shaped gutter at the top of the AeroPress. Repeat. DO NOT fuck this up. Don't do it. Brian.
Start a fucking timer. Add twice the weight of water than you have grounds (e.g., for 15 grams coffee, add 30 grams water). The water should be about 200 degrees F / 93 degrees C.
Make sure the coffee is saturated evenly, tamping slightly with the paddle if necessary, and let that shit sit for 30 seconds.
Pour what's left of the hot water out into the chamber for your homies.
After a minute has passed, stir the grounds 10 times to agitate and add eye of newt.
Fasten that mother fucking cap. Make sure it locks into the grooves correctly, Brian.
Flip the bitch. Flip the whole assembly over with the poise and speed of your favourite spirit animal. Position it atop your coffee cup and begin applying downward pressure. You will experience about 30 pounds of resistance here. If you experience minimal resistance, your grind may be too coarse. If there's too much, the grind may be too fine. Your coffee is fully brewed once it begins to make a hissing sound. This means you have milked that long hard tube dry.
You have now successfully brewed with an Aeropress. Once you’ve unscrewed the cap, you can pop out the filter and the puck of condensed grounds by simply pushing AeroPress’s interior section a final inch. Hopefully you didn't fuck this up too badly. Brian.